So far my semester has been extremely busy. Since i'm taking 6 modules, i have very little time for myself. But i'm glad that i have made the choice, enjoying myself when it comes to the chinese studies module. Made a few friends from my project group members. That's what i like about being involved in project works, making friends and knowing new people. I haven't been keeping up to my level of fitness, sad to say..... I have to start to be involved in swimming and cycling once again.

Anyway, I'm me once again! Cool! Ha, and i'm surprised at how fast i can change. I'm glad of the test given to me, it makes me a better person in the end. Facing the obstacle, your confidence gets shaken and you fear. But then, once you overcome it, your morale gets boosted and your inspirations lead you further on. Face your hurdles in life with courage and a positive mentality. Only you yourself can make the difference. No one can help you in this.

I'm not in the right sense of mind lately. This is not right. I have to get a hold of mysef again. I think i'm not ready yet.......

To the Virgin, To Make Much of Time
by Robert Herrick (1591-1674)

Gather ye rose-buds while ye may,

Old Time is still a-flying;

And this same flower that smiles today,

Tomorrow will be dying.

The glorious lamp of heaven, the sun,

The higher he's a-getting,

The sooner will his race be run,

And nearer he's to setting.

That age is best which is the first,

When youth and blood are warmer;

But being spent, the worse, and worst

Times, still succeed the former.

Then be not coy, but use your time,

And while ye may, go marry;

For having lost but once your prime,

You may for ever tarry.

I think I have understood now. I shall start from the begining, once again. The foundation is jeopardised, and so reinforce it, the roots are shaken, so strengthen it. Let's just begin from stage 1 again, have it all over from the start again.

Lester was sad one day. He was upset and depressed about something. This issue disturbed him so much that he couldn't get over it. He wanted a solution and he went to the old wise sage Javier. "Oh wise Javier, I am depressed and sad. Could you give me something to make me feel happy? I want to be happy everyday, every hour ever minute and every second." Javier replied, "Ah..... that is very simple. I can make you a potion that makes you happy forever. Go to the whole village, every single house-hold and ask of a person who reveals that he is never sad before in his entire life. From there, ask a piece of fire-wood from this person for I need it to provide the suitable flame to brew the potion. Lester went to the whole village to search for this person. Yet, he could not find such a person. Lester went back to Javier in disappointment and said, "my wise sage, I cannot find anyone who fits your description. Everyone in the village has been sad before." Javier smiled and said, "Now do you understand why I ask you to undertake this task? I wanted you to find out yourself that in life, there are moments of sadness and happiness. What is happiness if there is no sadness? How do you tell them apart if they do not exist in the first place? Happiness co-exist with sadness. To ask for happiness, you will too ask for sadness. So why do you ask of happiness from me? Since you do not want sadness, what is the point?" Lester was very confused. He could not comprehend what Javier was saying.

So Javier took out a stick and asked Lester. "Is this stick long or short?" Lester said, "I think it is long." Javier took out another longer stick, referring to the original stick he asked the same question. Lester said "its short now" Javier asked, "why is it that the same object that I'm referring to, changes in its characteristic even though I did nothing to the stick itself? Did the nature of the stick change? Obviously it didn''t! What is it that changes then?" Lester couldn't answer the question. "The stick didn't change. It is your perspective that changes. It is your views that changes. They are like the water plants on the river without its roots. It drifts from one place to another. It is ever-changing, never constant or consistent. So are your emotions, of happiness and sadness, you sway from one end to the other because your emotions are built on your views and thoughts. And you will continue to do that if you are looking for happiness." Javier continued, "The way of life is the middle-way! It is neither happiness nor sadness. It is the intermediate of both emotions. There is not even a word for it. Yet you can cultivate it. Now take your leave, Lester. This is all I have to say and my answer for you."

Lester was struck with such amazement and was enlightened. He finally understood and he stopped asking for happiness, living his life the middle-way.